CORRECT LYRICS
Lyrics : Friday Night Pyro (July 31st, 2020)
XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (7-31-2020)
XPWEW Friday Night Pyro
Date: July 31st, 2020
Episode: 437
Channel: VICE TV @ 10PM EST
*All or Nothing highlights capture
- Lotus wins Case Your Luck
- Myron & Kotto winning the t**les
- Joe Gacy and Audrey Carbine slugfest
- Priscilla retains over Doxy
- Romeo wins Case Your Luck
- El Demonio wins PPV debut over Ethan Bedlam
- Ruckus defeats McGraw by 1 point in Ironman Cla**ic Bout
Opening Segment: We see The Set’s limo pull up to the parking lot area and the door opens and usually we see blunt smoke escape from the car but not this time which is odd. And slowly we see the XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion Ruckus with a hoodie tightly draped over his head with the t**le on his shoulder. GM Troy Clausen walks up
Troy: Ruckus congratulations last Sunday on retaining the world t**le.
(Ruckus undoes his hoodie)
Troy: I just wanted to let you know you should have your driver park this limo somewhere safe because Leonard isn’t here, he hasn’t arrived yet and..
Ruckus: Are you trying to set me up?
Troy: Set? Get it?
Ruckus: Huh?
Troy: Nothing, never mind I’m saying last time he was nowhere to be found he flung a chair through the windshield
Ruckus: Maybe that punk learned his lesson, that he couldn’t hang with the champ for an hour and he’s afraid to show his face
Troy: Tonight your gonna go 1 on 1 with GG
Ruckus: I’ll do that. Boss. Thank you for letting me know Leonard ain’t here. You should fire him for missing work like the office told you when I no-showed Juneteenth. Do the right thing
(Ruckus walks away: Troy ponders)
(Jake Awesome exits the limo with a mean look, Jordan Oliver exits the limo with a grimace, Myron and Kotto exit the limo with a c*cky grin, Siaka Lexoni exits with a serious face and head nods Clausen then lastly Chrissy Rivera exits the limo and doesn’t even look at Troy)
- The NEW XPWEW Tag Team Champions: THE SET: Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil enter with Siaka Lexoni
- 3M Ultra & M3 Quintillo enter
Tag Team Match
M1: The SET Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil (w/ Siaka Lexoni) def. 3M3
After the match: Myron and Kotto flaunt into the camera and boost that they are the best in tag team wrestling today
Backstage: Audrey Carbine is in Troy Clausen’s office and walks in Joe Gacy
Audrey: Look here comes the town idiot
Gacy: Shut the f*** up Carbine
Troy Clausen: Will you two jagaloons please stop just for one itty bitty second. I saw the match at All or Nothing and damn it you two could be a good team if you tried to like each other a bit now I’ve hired you both an Anger Management Psycholigist
Audrey & Gacy: *Groan* (indistinct chatter of disdain)
Troy: So welcome your new anger management psycholigist: (Troy Clausen turns around and quickly puts on a white lab coat) Me!
Troy: Audrey, say something nice about Joe, and Joe please…please say something nice about Audrey hmm
Joe: What the f*** is this
Troy: Just one thing, for god sake
Joe: (hocks loogie) and stares at Carbine
Carbine: Do it…do it pu**y
Gacy: (stalling)…. (Turns over) spits in potted plant in the corner of the room and walks away
(Troy Clausen and Audrey Carbine stare as Gacy leaves)
Troy: Believe it or not..I think we’ve already made significant progress
Carbine: (ignores Troy)
- Doxy Deity and her protege Thunder Rosa join commentary with Kailtyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds
- Priscilla Kelly enters
- Kiera Hogan enters with 911 Brian Lee
1 on 1
M2: Priscilla Kelly (c) def. Kiera Hogan (w/ Brian Lee)
((During the match we see Chrissy Rivera watching the match on a screen backstage with Siaka Lexoni)
(After the match: Lotus comes out with the briefcase and fakes a cash in on Priscilla who’s still a bit fresh and ready instead Lotus clocks Kiera Hogan with the briefcase and avoids 911 Brian Lee, Priscilla wipes away the blood off her lip and bows to Lotus who walking uo the ramp gets clotheslined by The Set’s Chrissy Rivera, Chrissy hits that cheap shot and then jets it up the stairs like a coward. Siaka is such a loudmouth here and it’s great cla**ic Jimmy Hart style heat.)
In ring segment: Golden Bryce enters the ring and cuts a promo about he’s upset he didn’t win CYL the other night at ALL OR NOTHING to where he is interrupted by his old rival earlier this year in Champagne Clausen
- Champagne calls Bryce a LOSER
Garrett Thompson enters with a purpose, he was very close to winning the CYL in fact it came down to him and Romeo at the very end so his promo against Bryce is one of conviction that he’s the one who really lost. Garrett calls Champagne a one hit wonder to which Champagne calls Garrett a “never was”.
- The Marauder Simon Gotch enters with Mandy Leon
To which Simon Gotch calls all three of them delusional and invalids
- Alveno La Flare enters annoyed with Champagne, GT and Gotch all bagging on his cousin Bryce so Alveno defends Golden Bryce his cousin as an actual proven champion and Lockdown main venter, GT quickly chimes in “well me too” (Lockdown 5) and then Alveno challenge them to a 2 on 3 match right now and here we go:
2 on 3 Tag Team Match
M3: Golden Bryce & Alveno La Flare def. Champagne Clausen, Garrett Thompson & “The Marauder” Simon Gotch
- After the match Golden Bryce gives Alveno a nod of approval, they work really good together however the trio of heels have no love lost as GT, Champagne & Gotch all equally despise each other and all separately disdain in their own bubbles
Ad: Heatwave 2020 ad
- El Demonio enters
ALL OR NOTHING rematch
1 on 1
M4: El Demonio def. Ethan Bedlam
In ring segment: Romeo Roselli cuts a truly star-making promo about how his legacy was always to become XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion and now that he has possession of the Case Your Luck briefcase that’s a reality
- Jordan Oliver comes out with the XPWEW Juniorweight T**le and also holding Ruckus’ world t**le, Ruckus lags behind with Myron and Kotto and Siaka at the ramp
Jordan: Lil Romeo, pimp you gonna be the only dude to cash in and lose, How bout you take the junorweight challenge before you even cross the mane Ruckus
Romeo: (signals Jordan)
1 on 1
M5: Jordan Oliver def. Romeo Roselli
(Interference when Garrett Thompson comes out and hits his patented elbow on Romeo to which Jordan quickly wraps up Romeo for the 1-2-3)
- Garrett then grabs the briefcase while Bedlam holds Romeo Roselli up and nails Romeo over the skull with the Case Your Luck briefcase
- On commentary Kailtyn Khoas announces Death Machines will try to work together as a team as they take on the newly formed team of Golden Bryce and his little cousin Alveno La Flare next week on Friday Night Pyro
In ring segment
- Jake Awesome with a bandage on his head enters with The Set: (Jordan Oliver, Ruckus, Myron, Kotto, Chrissy Rivera & Siaka Lexoni)
[I gotta mention how THE SET is drippin' in gold here: Ruckus = World | Jordan = JrWeight | Myron & Kotto = Tag | Jake = International
Jake: All or Nothing, was more of Something and Somewhat for The Set: Ruckus retained he squashed that maggot Leonard McGraw, Myron and Kotto got the job done against the Malfunction Machines; Good job boys. Chrissy was robbed of the women's Case Your Luck BUT I WAS GOING TO LEAD JORDAN OLIVER TO THAT BRIEFCASE. It wasn't for me, I was there to insure Jordan Oliver: The fastest rising star in XPWEW no in pro wrestling could secure the bag and if THE SET ever lost possession of the world t**le we would have hope. The great white hope himself Jordan Olvier to snag it right back for The SET
Jordan: I have been the Juniorweight Champion for EXACTLY 355 days, that means in 10 days I will have held this t**le one calendar year because I'm young, dumb and f**kin OVERRRRR
Jake: That's right. All Man....Let me tell you something. I thought I crippeled you and your little girlfriend but I guess I didn't get the job done. Because I'm making a challenge. Jake Awesome THE MAMMOTH. will knock Tenille Dashwood's TEETH down her F**KIN THROAT......
- All Man and Tenille Dashwood appear on the t**an tron
Jordan: LOOK AT THE COWARDS! LOOK AT THE COWARDS!
Jake: Via Satellite real smooth p****
All Man: Jake, you tried to kill me and that was one thing. Now you've threatened my wife. And as a MAN....I'm going to knock your teeth down your throat
Jake: laughs it off
All Man: I'm gonna be a Friday Night Pyro next week and I'm going to make you a challenge, that you can't refuse. Next week I'm gonna make the annoucement I want the world to hear because I WILL get my redemption and I WILL embarra** you
All Woman: ............F**K YOU
(Jake Awesome with his arms crossed on the rope in silence exits the ring and The Set follows)
Nick Simmonds: Wow, I'm at a loss for words. What will All Man's announcement be next week?
- GG enters
- Ruckus enters with Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil & Siaka Lexoni
1 on 1
M6: Ruckus def. GG
After the match on the T**ANTRON: We see Leoanrd McGraw dragging a XPWEW camera man around in his truck
Leonard: Well I'm here in the city of brotherly love Philadelphia, Pennsylvania aka the home of XPWEW World Champion Ruckus
(Ruckus looks perplexed staring at the t**an tron while standing in the ring)
Leonard: Well hell would you look at that? Ruckus's house. I remember seeing this brick sh*t house in that VICE tv special. Well Ima just stand here on the porch and I got this jerry can here...ooops I spilt some on ya front porch
(Leonard drips the jerry can all over the front porch to the mail box)
(Ruckus is screaming at the t**an tron like a maniac as The Set tries to calm him down)
Leonard: Well hell I ain't much for smoking weed like you do, but hell I'll try anything once
(Leonard pulls out a match and lights up a cigarette and inhales)
(Zoom in on bug eyed ENRAGED Ruckus in the ring)
(Leonard takes a big drag off the cigarette then spits it out "Bad for the lungs I can't go sixty minutes after smoking one of these sum b*t*hes"
(Leonard lights a match and stares at the camera "See you in hell Motherfu****" *throws match into gasoline*)
(Ruckus' safehouse porch goes up in flames as Leoanrd stares at the camera)
(Ruckus screaming and he is extremely p*ssed)
(Ruckus' house in Philly 2700 miles away is engulfed in flames) as the show ends
Show ends
XPWEW Friday Night Pyro
Date: July 31st, 2020
Episode: 437
Channel: VICE TV @ 10PM EST
*All or Nothing highlights capture
- Lotus wins Case Your Luck
- Myron & Kotto winning the t**les
- Joe Gacy and Audrey Carbine slugfest
- Priscilla retains over Doxy
- Romeo wins Case Your Luck
- El Demonio wins PPV debut over Ethan Bedlam
- Ruckus defeats McGraw by 1 point in Ironman Cla**ic Bout
Opening Segment: We see The Set’s limo pull up to the parking lot area and the door opens and usually we see blunt smoke escape from the car but not this time which is odd. And slowly we see the XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion Ruckus with a hoodie tightly draped over his head with the t**le on his shoulder. GM Troy Clausen walks up
Troy: Ruckus congratulations last Sunday on retaining the world t**le.
(Ruckus undoes his hoodie)
Troy: I just wanted to let you know you should have your driver park this limo somewhere safe because Leonard isn’t here, he hasn’t arrived yet and..
Ruckus: Are you trying to set me up?
Troy: Set? Get it?
Ruckus: Huh?
Troy: Nothing, never mind I’m saying last time he was nowhere to be found he flung a chair through the windshield
Ruckus: Maybe that punk learned his lesson, that he couldn’t hang with the champ for an hour and he’s afraid to show his face
Troy: Tonight your gonna go 1 on 1 with GG
Ruckus: I’ll do that. Boss. Thank you for letting me know Leonard ain’t here. You should fire him for missing work like the office told you when I no-showed Juneteenth. Do the right thing
(Ruckus walks away: Troy ponders)
(Jake Awesome exits the limo with a mean look, Jordan Oliver exits the limo with a grimace, Myron and Kotto exit the limo with a c*cky grin, Siaka Lexoni exits with a serious face and head nods Clausen then lastly Chrissy Rivera exits the limo and doesn’t even look at Troy)
- The NEW XPWEW Tag Team Champions: THE SET: Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil enter with Siaka Lexoni
- 3M Ultra & M3 Quintillo enter
Tag Team Match
M1: The SET Myron Reed & Kotto Brazil (w/ Siaka Lexoni) def. 3M3
After the match: Myron and Kotto flaunt into the camera and boost that they are the best in tag team wrestling today
Backstage: Audrey Carbine is in Troy Clausen’s office and walks in Joe Gacy
Audrey: Look here comes the town idiot
Gacy: Shut the f*** up Carbine
Troy Clausen: Will you two jagaloons please stop just for one itty bitty second. I saw the match at All or Nothing and damn it you two could be a good team if you tried to like each other a bit now I’ve hired you both an Anger Management Psycholigist
Audrey & Gacy: *Groan* (indistinct chatter of disdain)
Troy: So welcome your new anger management psycholigist: (Troy Clausen turns around and quickly puts on a white lab coat) Me!
Troy: Audrey, say something nice about Joe, and Joe please…please say something nice about Audrey hmm
Joe: What the f*** is this
Troy: Just one thing, for god sake
Joe: (hocks loogie) and stares at Carbine
Carbine: Do it…do it pu**y
Gacy: (stalling)…. (Turns over) spits in potted plant in the corner of the room and walks away
(Troy Clausen and Audrey Carbine stare as Gacy leaves)
Troy: Believe it or not..I think we’ve already made significant progress
Carbine: (ignores Troy)
- Doxy Deity and her protege Thunder Rosa join commentary with Kailtyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds
- Priscilla Kelly enters
- Kiera Hogan enters with 911 Brian Lee
1 on 1
M2: Priscilla Kelly (c) def. Kiera Hogan (w/ Brian Lee)
((During the match we see Chrissy Rivera watching the match on a screen backstage with Siaka Lexoni)
(After the match: Lotus comes out with the briefcase and fakes a cash in on Priscilla who’s still a bit fresh and ready instead Lotus clocks Kiera Hogan with the briefcase and avoids 911 Brian Lee, Priscilla wipes away the blood off her lip and bows to Lotus who walking uo the ramp gets clotheslined by The Set’s Chrissy Rivera, Chrissy hits that cheap shot and then jets it up the stairs like a coward. Siaka is such a loudmouth here and it’s great cla**ic Jimmy Hart style heat.)
In ring segment: Golden Bryce enters the ring and cuts a promo about he’s upset he didn’t win CYL the other night at ALL OR NOTHING to where he is interrupted by his old rival earlier this year in Champagne Clausen
- Champagne calls Bryce a LOSER
Garrett Thompson enters with a purpose, he was very close to winning the CYL in fact it came down to him and Romeo at the very end so his promo against Bryce is one of conviction that he’s the one who really lost. Garrett calls Champagne a one hit wonder to which Champagne calls Garrett a “never was”.
- The Marauder Simon Gotch enters with Mandy Leon
To which Simon Gotch calls all three of them delusional and invalids
- Alveno La Flare enters annoyed with Champagne, GT and Gotch all bagging on his cousin Bryce so Alveno defends Golden Bryce his cousin as an actual proven champion and Lockdown main venter, GT quickly chimes in “well me too” (Lockdown 5) and then Alveno challenge them to a 2 on 3 match right now and here we go:
2 on 3 Tag Team Match
M3: Golden Bryce & Alveno La Flare def. Champagne Clausen, Garrett Thompson & “The Marauder” Simon Gotch
- After the match Golden Bryce gives Alveno a nod of approval, they work really good together however the trio of heels have no love lost as GT, Champagne & Gotch all equally despise each other and all separately disdain in their own bubbles
Ad: Heatwave 2020 ad
- El Demonio enters
ALL OR NOTHING rematch
1 on 1
M4: El Demonio def. Ethan Bedlam
In ring segment: Romeo Roselli cuts a truly star-making promo about how his legacy was always to become XPWEW World Heavyweight Champion and now that he has possession of the Case Your Luck briefcase that’s a reality
- Jordan Oliver comes out with the XPWEW Juniorweight T**le and also holding Ruckus’ world t**le, Ruckus lags behind with Myron and Kotto and Siaka at the ramp
Jordan: Lil Romeo, pimp you gonna be the only dude to cash in and lose, How bout you take the junorweight challenge before you even cross the mane Ruckus
Romeo: (signals Jordan)
1 on 1
M5: Jordan Oliver def. Romeo Roselli
(Interference when Garrett Thompson comes out and hits his patented elbow on Romeo to which Jordan quickly wraps up Romeo for the 1-2-3)
- Garrett then grabs the briefcase while Bedlam holds Romeo Roselli up and nails Romeo over the skull with the Case Your Luck briefcase
- On commentary Kailtyn Khoas announces Death Machines will try to work together as a team as they take on the newly formed team of Golden Bryce and his little cousin Alveno La Flare next week on Friday Night Pyro
In ring segment
- Jake Awesome with a bandage on his head enters with The Set: (Jordan Oliver, Ruckus, Myron, Kotto, Chrissy Rivera & Siaka Lexoni)
[I gotta mention how THE SET is drippin' in gold here: Ruckus = World | Jordan = JrWeight | Myron & Kotto = Tag | Jake = International
Jake: All or Nothing, was more of Something and Somewhat for The Set: Ruckus retained he squashed that maggot Leonard McGraw, Myron and Kotto got the job done against the Malfunction Machines; Good job boys. Chrissy was robbed of the women's Case Your Luck BUT I WAS GOING TO LEAD JORDAN OLIVER TO THAT BRIEFCASE. It wasn't for me, I was there to insure Jordan Oliver: The fastest rising star in XPWEW no in pro wrestling could secure the bag and if THE SET ever lost possession of the world t**le we would have hope. The great white hope himself Jordan Olvier to snag it right back for The SET
Jordan: I have been the Juniorweight Champion for EXACTLY 355 days, that means in 10 days I will have held this t**le one calendar year because I'm young, dumb and f**kin OVERRRRR
Jake: That's right. All Man....Let me tell you something. I thought I crippeled you and your little girlfriend but I guess I didn't get the job done. Because I'm making a challenge. Jake Awesome THE MAMMOTH. will knock Tenille Dashwood's TEETH down her F**KIN THROAT......
- All Man and Tenille Dashwood appear on the t**an tron
Jordan: LOOK AT THE COWARDS! LOOK AT THE COWARDS!
Jake: Via Satellite real smooth p****
All Man: Jake, you tried to kill me and that was one thing. Now you've threatened my wife. And as a MAN....I'm going to knock your teeth down your throat
Jake: laughs it off
All Man: I'm gonna be a Friday Night Pyro next week and I'm going to make you a challenge, that you can't refuse. Next week I'm gonna make the annoucement I want the world to hear because I WILL get my redemption and I WILL embarra** you
All Woman: ............F**K YOU
(Jake Awesome with his arms crossed on the rope in silence exits the ring and The Set follows)
Nick Simmonds: Wow, I'm at a loss for words. What will All Man's announcement be next week?
- GG enters
- Ruckus enters with Myron Reed, Kotto Brazil & Siaka Lexoni
1 on 1
M6: Ruckus def. GG
After the match on the T**ANTRON: We see Leoanrd McGraw dragging a XPWEW camera man around in his truck
Leonard: Well I'm here in the city of brotherly love Philadelphia, Pennsylvania aka the home of XPWEW World Champion Ruckus
(Ruckus looks perplexed staring at the t**an tron while standing in the ring)
Leonard: Well hell would you look at that? Ruckus's house. I remember seeing this brick sh*t house in that VICE tv special. Well Ima just stand here on the porch and I got this jerry can here...ooops I spilt some on ya front porch
(Leonard drips the jerry can all over the front porch to the mail box)
(Ruckus is screaming at the t**an tron like a maniac as The Set tries to calm him down)
Leonard: Well hell I ain't much for smoking weed like you do, but hell I'll try anything once
(Leonard pulls out a match and lights up a cigarette and inhales)
(Zoom in on bug eyed ENRAGED Ruckus in the ring)
(Leonard takes a big drag off the cigarette then spits it out "Bad for the lungs I can't go sixty minutes after smoking one of these sum b*t*hes"
(Leonard lights a match and stares at the camera "See you in hell Motherfu****" *throws match into gasoline*)
(Ruckus' safehouse porch goes up in flames as Leoanrd stares at the camera)
(Ruckus screaming and he is extremely p*ssed)
(Ruckus' house in Philly 2700 miles away is engulfed in flames) as the show ends
Show ends
