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Canceling the Bar Mitzvah
par
William Finn
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Jason? Jason! (sung) If he doesn’t want a bar mitzvah Then he will not have a bar mitzvah Because mother says Because mother knows best And I'm too old To get on my knees And beg him Since the world has gone to hell And if he thinks it’s bust It is probably just as well (yelled) Jason? Jas’? (sung) What has Whizzer done to deserve this? I mean what is the threat That he won't get what he deserves to get What's the big surprise? Open up your eyes If he doesn’t want a bar mitzvah Then he will not have a bar mitzvah Because my stomach aches And I've lost my desire And it’s a joke Now that Whizzer’s quickly dying I can’t handle Jason’s style Since he screams and taunts I will do what he wants And smile (yelled) Jason? Jas’? (sung) Since you do not want a bar mitzvah Then the whole thing's canceled There's no more bar mitzvah Why aren't you cheering? The whole thing’s canceled It's canceled It’s canceled If I knew that you’d start crying… Hell, I thought that you’d be glad Please don’t hate me though But I am going slowly [?] We’ll have a bar mitzvah Darling, if you want a bar mitzvah... We’ll have a bar mitzvah How are we going to have a bar mitzvah?
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