SUBMIT LYRICS
Top 100
Album releases
artists
Community
French
Spanish
Portuguese
Correction Lyrics
The Worst Pies in London
by
Stephen Sondheim
Back
Lyrics
A customer! (sung) Wait! What's yer rush? What's your hurry? You gave me such a— Fright. I thought you was a ghost Half a minute, can'tcher? Sit! Sit ye down! Sit! All I meant is that I Haven't seen a customer for weeks Did you come here for a pie, sir? Do forgive me if me head's a little vague— (spoken) Ugh! What was that? (sung) But you'd think we had the plague— From the way that people— Keep avoiding— (spoken) No, you don't! (sung) Heaven knows I try, sir! But there's no one comes in even to inhale— Right you are, sir. Would you like a drop of ale? Mind you, I can hardly blame them— Thеse are probably the worst piеs in London I know why nobody cares to take them— I should know I make them But good? No The worst pies in London— Even that's polite The worst pies in London— If you doubt it, take a bite Ugh! Is that just disgusting? You have to concede it It's nothing but crusting— Here drink this, you'll need it The worst pies in London— And no wonder with the price of meat What it is When you get it Never Thought I'd live to see the day Men'd think it was a treat Finding poor Animals Wot are dying in the street Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop Does a business but I notice something weird— Lately, all her neighbors' cats have disappeared Have to hand it to her— What I calls Enterprise Popping pussies into pies Wouldn't do in my shop— Just the thought of it's enough to make you sick And I'm telling you them pu**y cats is quick! No denying times is hard, sir— Even harder than The worst pies in London Only lard and nothing more— Is that just revolting? All greasy and gritty? It looks like it's molting And tastes like— Well, pity A woman alone With limited wind And the worst pies in London! Ah, sir Times is hard Times is hard Isn't that a room up there over the shop? If times are so hard, why don't you rent it out? Should bring in something. Up there? Huh. No one will go near it. People think it's haunted. You see, years ago something happened up there. Something not very nice.
music video
Your name will be published. Leave fields blanks to remain anonymous.
Submit
Modal title
×
Insert media
Video URL?
(YouTube, Vimeo, Instagram, DailyMotion, Soundcloud)
×
Remember me
Lost password
Sign in
Register
