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I'll Be Killing You (this Christmas)
by
Loudon Wainwright Iii
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from Haven't Got the Blues (Yet) I'll be killing you this Christmas 'Tis the season you must die Though there's no way that you'll miss this A Bushmaster's on my wish list My right to bear arms you cannot deny I'll be shooting folks this Christmas But there's no need to be worried or alarmed What's wrong with a handgun When everybody has one Which is why we all need to be armed? That's right I'm armed and dangerous this Christmas It's an oxymoron I don't have a sound But you won't pry my fingers from it My precious second amendment Guarantees a clip that holds a hundred rounds Santa's packing heat this Christmas In your school your church and your department store The evidence is hazy Background checks can't kill a crazy We need firepower that can win a war And so I'll be wasting you this Christmas And the NRA they lobby so it's so I love our great nation The real world is my PlayStation I'll blow you away beneath the mistletoe I'll be killing you this Christmas
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