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Lover’s Spat
by
Kristin Chenoweth
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Lyrics
Oh no, no, no, no, no, no Please, no song, I'll do anything Yeah, guys, we're actually in the middle of some— You can't plow a field without hittin' some stones Every steak's bound to have some fat You can't eat a fish without gettin' some bones And you can't have love without having a lover's spat Would you leave us alone for just a minute? Seriously, please First she says somethin' bound to get his gander Then he says somethin' mean to get her back Then she complains that he don't undеrstand her And then he givеs her a smack Oh, oh no, that's not okay Unless it's consensual It's just a Love-love-lover's spat Just 'cause you're feudin' Don't mean that you're concludin' It's as plain, plain, plain as that It's only a lover's spat First he says Yeah, I-I'm not doing this Then she says Oh, what a surprise, you don't want to talk about it Then he says Um, what is that supposed to mean? Then she says It's not supposed to mean anything; I said what I meant Then he says I can't do this with all these people around Then she says Oh, you can't do this period Every gal and feller Are bound to have a yeller We have to get out of here Yeah, yeah Even Adam frolicked in the garden Living there was such a sweet delight 'Til Adam, he said, "Madam, beg your pardon But my apple's missing a bite" They (They) had (Had) a (A) Love-love-lover's spat Just 'cause you're wranglin' Don't mean that you're untanglin' It's as plain, plain, plain as that It's only a lover's spat First she says So what's the plan, Josh, look for someone new? Then he says I'm not having a discussion that's part of a musical number Then she says Why won't you just answer the question? Then he says Fine, yes, if it's a way to get out of here Then she says I knew it, I knew it Then he says Agh! It's just a Love-love-lover's (It's just a lover's, lover's) spat Just 'cause you bicker Don't mean that you'll end quicker It's as plain, plain, plain (It's as plain, as plain) as that It's only a lover's spat When he puts her on the spot And she spits out of spite They're a kettle and a pot Both convinced they're right And they think it's all for nought Then they kiss goodnight It's over Mel No, I mean it, we're officially broken up now You're free to find true love with whoever you want 'Cause this is it, the end And, and you suck, and I hate you, and I hope you die Mel Stop saying Mel, you sound like a freakin' idiot That's how you end a lover's How you end a lover's spat
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