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Sick of Myself
by
JT Music
Featuring(s) : Andrea Storm Kaden
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Lyrics
[Verse 1: JT Music] What's torment if you’re born into it? So you've never known different? Forced into it as you poured into it All of your tears and seared your skin to it With Scorn, I'll become more intimate Forever ’cause I can't short infinite I am awake, but I'm tied to my fate No escape when the hope has no more give to it Am I of a primordial origin Or did somebody conjure a corpse again? How organic the horrors, abhorrent A prison of bone, and my body's a form of it As I'm foraging for any nourishing Sources of hope, which surely I'm forgin' The judge and the jury, I'm cеrtainly more than Court is in session and I’m getting sworn in I can fashion a wеapon of organs Sickening, twisted, threaded with thorns And although I’ve fallen, I've found my reform Harvest a halo, harness some horns Getting harder to follow my heart With the modular structure fallin’ apart To be swallowed whole, every soul retaken Symbiotic, all forsaken [Chorus: JT Music] I'm another abandoned creation You think you're living in hell? Listen, I've been there myself I’ve been bent over backwards, I'm breakin' Imprisoned within my cells, I'm gettin' sick of myself I did not give my all, it was taken Then I was spit outta hell, I wear the stigmata well I've been scorned, and I'm scared to awaken Because I sicken myself, so fuckin' sick of myself [Verse 2: JT Music] My genesis, directionless No intended cosmic purpose In the end, can I make any sense of it Maybe the cost of my blood was worth it? Cursed with the burden to become conscious A labyrinth of lies, I'm lost in Caution, a question to God is toxic Sorry, if you got one, drop it Call it survival, swallow your pride Solving a puzzle of body and mind As I'm untyin' the knot in my spine All these entrails are probably mine To falter or fail, is not by design But why am I finding it all intertwined? These are the seeds of a garden divine But the fruit isn't ripe if it's rotten inside Depravity and despair Sense of gravity's not even there Too many questions up in the air Finding my strength while losing my hair Got a code in my DNA Even though I don't know it, I keep it safe But that won't matter if it's all connected Eyes wide open, no perspective [Bridge: Andrea Storm Kaden] If faith made us able to stand Logic knocked me right down to my knees 'Cause that faith hides the face of a sham And God is not talking to me I was one of his sheep, but lying under the wool A wolf was hiding his teeth, I am abominable Praytell, if he's walkin' with you Why the hell ain't he talkin' to me? Now how can I start to believe? [Chorus: JT Music] I'm another abandoned creation You think you're living in hell? Listen, I've been there myself I've been bent over backwards, I'm breakin' Imprisoned within my cells, I'm gettin' sick of myself I did not give my all, it was taken Then I was spit outta hell, I wear the stigmata well I've been scorned, and I'm scared to awaken Because I sicken myself, so fuckin' sick of myself
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