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Reality
by
II3SZ
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So listen, I say people barely eating so I thank God for this bite No light food or gas but yeah I thank God for them nights I always knew wrong from right but I never chose the right Cause God gave my father all the good sh*t up in life Cause man that n***a never helped my mama with sh*t Wanted a boy but got a girl so told my mama "kick bricks" But speaking of bricks I wish I had a f**king brick to bust this n***a head until he dead for treating me like sh*t But that ain't the case the case is why I chase I chase my father down wondering why I’m such a disgrace Man that's crazy and all these n***as tryna f**k And girls like jell as f**k cause he took me out to dinner and spent a couple of bucks But I could give a f**k about a n***a and his bucks Don't need no drug dealer come talk to me in a tux One week later want a quickie hold up n***a whats the rush? N***as want a stupid b*t*h to walk over and keep it hush Well I ain’t that b*t*h So next topic, people getting toxic I try to stay up in the house like a motherf**king hostage Cause I don't want no drama grew up just wanting commas Counting a hundred pennies tryna get a dollar burger for my mama But the grind stayed strong mama ain't on her own I plan to take us from the hood to a made haven throne See mama all I got brothers don't give a crap If I got shot up on the block they'd probably raise they hands and clap Cause they think I'm real sl*ttish cause I do not dress thuggish I wear that tight sh*t to keep these b*t*hes mean mugging So my bros think I'm a hoe f**k for money on the low When 9 out of 10 a n***a wanna f**k it's "no" I got standards wanted to be a dancer , 13 years old praying for people who got cancer But they don’t see that sh*t but in my spirit I’m rich Ladies time to walk away from n***as who calling you a b*t*h Cause we deserve the best I put that on my chest So worried where he been at its leaving you with no rest It's just a bunch of stress But it’s time for a change not booksmart but got brain This is only three-fourths of my issues I ran through three rolls of Scott tissues In a matter of minutes tryna wipe the tears away Don't want to be bothered today so you ain't gotta say hey F**k yo impression of me so much aggression in me While b*t*hes walking round like this a beauty pageant I was arrested at 14 shoplifting, ain't have sh*t Yo lets talk about the f**king hard life I had Yall grew up in Nikes, white tees, and hell of Chanel bags You should be glad you got a night pad I couldn’t afford a pad to put on my a** So I was using my face rag Yo lets talk about the f**king hard life I had I'm out here taking jabs yall out here doing the dab I'm hoping one day in life my father would take the tab for once Haven't saw this n***a in months Cause he out here f**king 17 year old's in the b***s What the f**k my n***a you so disgust B*t*h a** n***a you need some blush for making my tears flush My own bro told me I couldn't rap but look now Now I need to know which way to go for the next show All the way across the map "You just a lil black b*t*h who'll never be sh*t" Remember that's what you told me? But I am not buying that sh*t that's not what you sold me And the way you beat my a** from one wall to the next Really makes me question yo sex and did you do that to yo ex? Or just that one moment you wanted to feel stronger than Trex Let me know, cause what if yo daughter grow up a hoe? Would you burn her with boiling hot water on the stove? Or beat her like Kunta Kinte cause shes blacker than most? You know what? That a** whooping was the best of my life I'm feeling sorry for the lady you ever call wife Cause I got a funny taste in my mouth Like peanut b***er on rice That I'm a catch you slipping one day and I ain't talking no ice And it won't be nice its gone get real ugly You post to be the brother who love me and hug me Not the one who picks me up by my neck strangle me and shoves me I know you think I don't matter But as a individual there's something special about me that stands out in circles like the donut wrapper I'm a give you one second to count your blessings that you not in jail living in this house with you is so damn reckless it feel like hell But I'm off it , keep calm Hey Mom you really deserve every penny I make When I look at you I see my mother and father lets call that a double take, you are so f**king great You my superhero you carry so much weight on your back you ain't even got room for a cape You the only one who give me hope and this the realist sh*t I ever wrote Times changed was dealing with so much pain But at the same time it's alot that I overcame Went from hungry last year now dressing in cashmeres It's just a bag I won't brag cause I struggled the past years I had a empty fridge would eat me a stale bagel Thanksgiving Day with only me at the table No friends or family, demons surrounding me Sometimes I had thoughts of jumping off the balcony But um, I kept chewing on Doublemint bubblegum Leftovers in my stomach more like pieces of crumbs Around the wrong crowd they telling me "hit the blunt" My father don't want me like we don't want Donald Trump I was tryna keep it cool for my mammy Them long lines standing in that food pantry Wasn't a joke, losing my hope Got bags under my eyes looking like a wrinkled tote It was no sleep at all p*ssed in the bushes, no stalls Found a home then we was gone then more leaves than fall On my mama this sh*t was trauma Ain't have a solid number so how could we see a comma? While I was sleep it was rats running over my mom feet Just so she could work to get us something to eat Lets get deep, I'm hurting as I speak When life paid you dust just get a broom and sweep At 11 who you telling everything was hand me downs Jumped and stomped by 20 people while others stand around Nobody helped, everyday I felt invisible School so grimy the principal don't even got principles Once I turned 12 it was all hell Roaming the streets looking for D when I couldn't even spell Fighting demons with a poker face like everything swell Let's fast forward let me show you how my life has failed Remember them nights with no lights or gas? Washing up at the sink tryna clean my a** with cold water My entire body was freezing best believe it Jesus put me here for a reason 15, f**king on a man that's 35 good in the beginning Then ate my soul alive fooled myself thinking its love The way he layed with me But all we ever did was f**k and went to KFC It's sad, I degraded myself hated myself All this because I wasn't raised with a belt I know mama I hurt you staying out pa** curfew You deserve to sit back but I overworked you Remember when my music got 11 plays? Mama we here now these the better days So I'll be damned if I let a n***a take it away They body dropping in a instant like they break & escape Never going back to them old days of seeing them low plays So I entertain these n***as like I'm giving them roleplay The greatest things comes to the ones that waited gotta be patient It's about organization all my albums got my wallet on Fat Albert I donate to the shelters money, toys, and flowers We was in it more than hours the feeling was sour 300 people in one household using the same shower People got some f**king nerve to be mad that they rent due When people out here on the curb with covers and ripped shoes The homeless be the ones with good hearts I feel bad Cause they put everyone first by giving away they last Think about it!
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