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Never Google Your Symptoms
by
Henrik Widegren
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One evening, my father said: My son I?m dying and soon I?ll be gone But before my?final?farewell: Hear me. And?hear me well Do whatever you want?to do Have a plan or roll the dice But one thing is strictly taboo Please, follow my advice Never google your symptoms That is my only prescription You get a hundred diagnoses And medieval prognoses Every sign is a serious condition If you google ?cough? and ?diagnosis? You have got tuberculosis And if you google ?fever and red? You?ve got Ebola and soon will be dead And if you google ?I?ve a runny nose? It?s CSF. Your brain is leaking juice! And if you google itch and prognosis: Anaphylactic chock or psychosis So never google your symptoms Seldom it brings any wisdom You want to discover But you might uncover That you have an extra chromosome So this is what I heard my father say And then he closed his eyes and pa**ed away The autopsy report was very clear Death from hypochondric fear Which is custom When you google Your symptoms Never google your symptoms The hit list is never awesome Pain in your left arm? Heart attack alarm! Do you feel a little weak? Yes You?ve got ALS! If you have a slight anemia You?ve got leukemia! Are you a little crazy? You?ve got ADHD So never, ever google Your symptoms!
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